December 01, 2016


- I have entered that irrational, stressed out phase of pregnancy in which I feel overwhelmed by the number of things I need to do at this very second but also like they are impossible to accomplish in any imaginable time frame. This is reflected in the chaotic nature of what follows.

Of course it's all completely doable, I'm just tired and round and fell the other day and hurt my bum (everything's fine, except my balance). In other words, I just need a bath, some liposuction, and a couple days off from every one else that requires anything from me. And a good audiobook, because of course the one I'm listening to is entirely mediocre. Hit me with your recommendations.

- I'm hosting a Christmas ladies night with the church next week. I have one week to bring the Christmas cheer to our house and am really looking forward to it. So far I've pulled our bins out of storage and stuffed our advent calendar. The plan is to get the other crazy house tasks out of the way so I can decorate the tree Saturday night with a big glass of amaretto mug of tea and a Christmas movie on in the background. This is what is keeping me motivated.

I'm stumped on what to serve at my party, though. I've got a recipe for casserole cookies I'm going to try and I think I'll buy some shortbread. Other than that I'm lost. If you were coming to my party (and if you're in the area, you know you're invited) what would you want to eat/drink/be merry about?

- On an unrelated note, my boss is 81 years old and rather old fashioned. He's a very successful man that has had a very impressive career. He's done well for himself, and has a housekeeper to help him and his wife out. He's still very mentally with it, but he's, you know, old. He calls me his secretary (I think all the secretaries died when we entered the new millennium), asks me to photostat things, and doesn't understand how to turn his phone off of vibrate. He also calls his winter walking shoes his rubbers.

My boss is not great at tidying up after himself and we finally got our winter dump of snow Monday night. All week, he's been lamenting about the mess his rubbers make on the floor when he takes them off and puts them back on. All week I have been dying holding in my laughter. Because I am 12.

- I know everyone is anxiously awaiting news on how the baby's room is coming and the answer is: slowly; very freaking slowly. I needed to paint some furniture before I could move on to the actual setting up of the room. I did that this weekend with the giant bucket of white paint we've had kicking around the house for a couple years. I hate it, it's not glossy at all, and scuffs like no one's business, but we already have it so boom. Free. I was on my third and final coat on the bookshelf when I finally bothered to read the label on the offending bucket. It's a primer-sealer combo, clearly leftover from our basement reno. And now my hatred is completely justifiable.

I'd cry and weep at my own ignorance (I've painted our doors, door frames, and entertainment centre with it) except that it's nice to have an excuse to buy something new. I also used the better part of three gallons of that junk, so we got our money's worth. It won't take much to get a quick coat of semi-gloss on the doors next summer so they stop scuffing, and those suckers are well primed so let's pretend it's all good.

When it came to my dresser and bookshelf I knew in advance I'd need to put a couple coats of poly on it because of the horrible scuffing. Boom. No problem. I threw a couple coats on easy peasy Sunday night. It was dark, though, and I was tired so guess what? My poly streaked, it looks like cat pee, and now Karl needs to get in there and give it a gentle sand to get rid of the ugly. (I could do it, but I'm emotionally done with that paint job.) Fortunately, the dresser turned out really well. It was white to begin with and just needed some touch ups. The bookshelf could use another quick coat of white, but I've already poly'd it and it's just going to be storage furniture in baby's closet. So I quit before we ended up in worse shape than we started in.

In short (too late), a couple pieces of free furniture in okay shape that have been in dire need of painting for years, a bucket of wrong leftover "paint," some poly, and a couple hours of painting just saved us a couple hundred dollars. I'll take it. And I only cried once over the cat pee stains. I'm pregnant, though, so if I'm not crying every other day my tear ducts will probably explode.

- Tonight I'm planning on tackling the book explosion that has become our office/guest room. I sold our bookshelf and bought a new one from IKEA. That's the goal. It's also been a couple days since I cried so I'm going to watch Call the Midwife.

And now you know.

November 23, 2016

Two thoughts.

First, I'm going to a girls' night with some former co-workers tomorrow. I was only planning on going for a couple hours and using the pregnant mom card as my excuse. It starts at 6 so getting in some socializing and being home shortly after 8 felt like a win-win. I was also planning a productive weekend which isn't going to happen now, so I'm hoping to hammer some projects out once Parker's in bed today and tomorrow. Friday and Saturday nights will be dedicated to Gilmore Girls and chocolate chip cookies. (Side note: I contemplated pop-tarts, but can only have un-iced ones and they taste like cardboard anyway.) (Side note #2: NEVER MIND. I just realized that with some puff pastry and jam I can make my own pop-tarts.)

The problem is, yesterday our host texted us to let us know that she needs help bagging and labeling what sounds like clothing donations for seniors so we'll be doing a lot of that. When I told her I'd likely be a little late she said they'd save me some work. It's like that time I was invited to a wedding and then informed I was on set up and tear down for the whole event. How do you say no to charity/brides when you've already said you're going? I don't mind helping out, but feel a little hoodwinked. All I can say is, there had better be potato chips.

Second, I'm really enjoying being on the Goodreads party bus. It's motivating me to finish reading Today Will Be Different which I'm currently in the middle of and not enjoying at all. It's a quick read which is why I haven't bother putting it down. I liked Where'd You Go, Bernadette? but I listened to the audiobook and I'm wondering if that had some sort of impact. I've read this author's other book and hated it, too, which leads to the ultimate question: Does listening to an audiobook count as reading it?

I listen to a lot of audiobooks. I find listening to them an excellent way to get housework done during nap time, kill time while travelling/commuting, or knit along to. I don't consider audiobooks "reading," however, because they're listening. I'm still consuming the book, though, so does it count? The problem with audiobooks, too, is that it's all about who reads them. When I listened to Stephen Fry read Harry Potter it was actually magical. On the other hand, the fellow that reads the Song of Ice and Fire series kind of butchers it. Both are book series I love, but the audiobook experiences are night and day. I'm currently listening to Yes Please and I can tell you that it's a totally different experience than just reading it would be. I mean, Patrick Stewart reads part of it. That's definitely not in the paper version.

So do audiobooks count as Goodreads books? Yay or nay?

Homemade puff pastry pop-tarts. Yay or nay?

Leggings as pants. Yay or nay?

Who would win in a fight? Justin Trudeau's hair or Donald Trump's?

November 18, 2016

Things I've decided to stop doing.

Making plans with people. I've heard some really good excuses in the past year when I've asked someone to hang out. My personal favourite is from back in February when I asked a friend if she wanted to get together for coffee sometime to tell me all about her super awesome vacation she just went on. (Side note - no one really cares that much about your vacation, it's just an excuse to hang out.) She told me she was busy until April then hung out with our mutual friend the next day. We still haven't set up that coffee date. That's my bad for dropping in the "sometime." Being vague makes it more awkward for people to shoot you down. I haven't had much luck with the actual set dates either, though.

The problem with being a mom is that it's hard to maintain those great friendships with your non-parent friends because you run on totally different schedules. I'm pretty flexible, but being 6 1/2 months pregnant means I have a sizable to-do list, an early bedtime, and can't be farther than 100 feet away from a toilet at any given time. (Side note: I just realized why my dirty base boards are causing me serious anxiety. I'm nesting. Thank God there's a legitimate excuse for my insanity.) I used to really like being the childless friends, because we could go to our friends' places and play games once their brood was in bed, stay up late, and drink beer. Now no one wants to come over. Maybe our house smells like diapers.

The mom friend struggle is real, too. There are always kids to take into account, and we don't have many babysitting options outside of regularly scheduled working hours. I am morally opposed to paying a stranger to snoop through my things while my child sleeps. I just can't do it.

Trying to understand why the only ad I ever see on YouTube is for All Bran chili. When I think chili, I definitely think about all the fiber that I need to add on top of those beans. I can't even imagine feeding something that filled with fiber to Parker. Oh, the horrors! I also don't think my taste in music is that antiquated.

Figuring out what to talk to my hairdresser about. I love him. He does magic things to my hair for a good price. We just have nothing in common. The only things I have to talk about are my kid(s) and maybe Westworld, but I don't think he has cable. And he's 21 and gay, so no kids at the moment. I almost asked if he was excited for Gilmore Girls but I didn't want to stereotype.

Mopping my kitchen floor. If we ever send Parker to boarding school this will change, but until then I'll just spot clean between meals. What is even the point? A good vinegar spritz and a hot cloth should be just as good as a quality steam clean. It's not like there won't be more unidentifiable food smeared on the tile in 15 minutes anyway.

Coveting my mother in law's needle collection. So much beautiful colourful wood. I need to ask her to leave them for me in the will.

Expecting good things from a Starbucks. One would think that allergies being as common as they are, baristas would know which basic syrups contain dairy and which don't. Also which toppings to avoid putting on a dairy-free drink. One would clearly be expecting far too much.

Complaining. Anna out.